Category: Readers Articles of Interest

Girls Like You

 

Girls Like You

Blogging about International Women’s Day has become almost tradition at this point. You may think it odd that I continue to celebrate this day every year though it’s not considered an international holiday. But every year, International Women’s Day exemplifies the importance of positive reinforcement for young girls. Whenever I browse social media on March 8th, I’m always flooded with stories about strong women I can aspire to be or shown stories of the women who’ve fought for the rest of us to have made it so far. I’m also shown ways of helping others, whether that be through the UN Women’s social media pages, or Plan International or Amnesty International, I see a way of helping women who aren’t as fortunate as I am. But the most prominent feeling I get from International Women’s Day every year is that women deserve to feel valued and that by lifting each other up we can all feel stronger. Cheesy, but true.

This International Women’s Day I’m celebrating the women in my life. Whether that be friends I’ve grown up with through school, friends I’ve met through sports, friends I’ve gained through musical theatre, friends I’ve met more recently at University or the incredible women I’m surrounded by in my family. I’ve never felt limited by any of them, and all I’ve ever received is support. Support to push beyond the boundaries that may sometimes be in my way, and support to continue through those boundaries when there’s no way around them.

This International Women’s Day I want to thank the women who’ve had my back (and held my hair). To my friends, who I see every day being sensational young women and forging paths for themselves. To my family, who’ve shown me ways of being an amazing woman, regardless of whether they’re older than me or not. And to the women I see in the media punching through stereotypes and fighting even when it seems impossible. Thank you.

It’s not the perfect time to be a woman in today’s age; between the fight for reproductive rights, the fight for an equal place at the table, the fight to have the choice who to marry and when and the fight against the stereotypes, it’s still a tough world. But it used to be far, far tougher and we can’t deny that some things are better. Young girls are able to open a magazine and see people like Ashely Graham or Iskra Lawrence looking like their body type and having it be celebrated. Others are looking at entertainment and seeing that they are so much more than the stereotype that have thrust upon them because of the colour of their skin. Others are realising that they weren’t born to be in the body they have and understanding that that’s okay. Some are realising that they get to love whomever they want to love, and it’s a brilliant thing. Young women and women everywhere are beginning to see their value, because there are more outlets showcasing every kind of woman. So yeah, being a woman’s still not perfect, but at least women are understanding that they deserve the perfect rights.

International Women’s Day began on February 28, 1909 when the Socialist Party of America organised a women’s day in New York, with the International Socialist Woman’s Conference suggesting a Women’s Day be held annually. March 8th was introduced by the Soviet Union in 1917 when women gained suffrage and the date became a national holiday, later being adopted as the international date for Women’s Day in 1975 by the United Nations. To reiterate what I say every year, today isn’t a day for bashing men – I’d actually like to celebrate my Dad and my brother for always encouraging me to be me and be the best person I can be. Today is a day to celebrate the women in our history who have shaped the world when it was deemed impossible for them to do so.

Mary Kom, an Indian boxer once said, “Do not say you are weak, because you are a woman”. Don’t limit yourself because of your gender; sex is biological, gender is a social construct. The stereotypes placed on women have been placed there by the men and women of the past. Think – a century ago women weren’t allowed to vote in elections because ‘common sense’ deemed that women were incapable of making sound decisions without the aid of a man. The world has seen a fair share of female political leaders since then. Women who’ve changed the world in some way, or at least changed the world’s perception of what it is to be a woman. Being born a woman ought not limit anyone, and I’ll be damned if the young women growing up in this century think less of themselves because of the sex on their birth certificate.

Whether you were born a woman or discovered later in life you should have always been a woman, you count. You are more than the limits the world will often put on you.

You count, you mean something, and I can’t wait to see you change the history books.

By Tirion Davies

 

 

Dogs Are Clever…But They Can’t Do This

 

The Vale of Glamorgan website reminds us that it is an offence for us not to remove any faeces deposited by our dog. If we take our dog for a walk and it fouls in a public space it is our responsibility to pick it up. If we fail in our responsibility, we could be issued with a Fixed Penalty Notice of £75 or be prosecuted which could result in a fine of up to £1,000.

People living in the village are meticulous in caring for the environment in which we enjoy walking our dogs. We always take bags on our walk, pick up after our dog and dispose of waste in any council litter bin.

It seems however, that some people may have forgotten the recent campaign ‘Dogs are clever….but they can’t do this’. Please call into our local library and purchase your dog waste bags at £2.00 for 100 bags and help us to continue enjoying a clean environment. As the Dog Kennel Club points out: ‘Owners who do not meet their responsibilities only contribute to growing anti-dog sentiment and give dog owners a bad reputation within their local communities.’

 

 

Let’s Talk Organ Donation

Let’s talk organ donation. How many of you knew about the Organ Donation Act in Wales? Did you know about ‘opting-in’ or ‘opting-out’? Let’s talk about it.

Currently in Wales there is a scheme which came into effect in January of 2015 in an attempt to increase the number of organ donations throughout Wales. It states that you can ‘opt-in’ or ‘opt-out’ of organ donation. But what does that mean? It means that in the event of your death, a decision has to be made on whether or not your organs will be donated. Without making a decision about whether you want your organs to be donated or not (the ‘opt-in’ or ‘opt-out’ policies as they are dubbed) the decision is in your family’s hands. With your consent to be an organ donor post-mortem (by ‘opting-in’) and by ticking the box on your card which states your family is aware of your decision, there is no dispute. The same happens if you decide you don’t want to be an organ donor (by ‘opting-out’).

If you don’t make a decision – which isn’t the be-all and end-all of life – your family decides for you. There is an option which not many are aware of – you can appoint a representative to make the decision on your behalf. This means that they make the decision on your behalf when you die, and it means that the decision is made by someone you know will do what’s in your best interest, rather than someone who would make the decision based on their own views.

I can’t tell you which way to register. That’s not my place. I can, however, offer you my own personal opinion. When I turned eighteen, I made the decision to ‘opt-in’ to the organ donation act. My decision was made without the influence of family or friends – it was a decision I made on my own behalf because of the beliefs I have surrounding organ donation. It wasn’t either a spur-of-the-moment decision. I did my research and came to the conclusion that I’d like to be an organ donor when I die.

My role here isn’t to tell you that you should ‘opt-in’ and it’s in no way discouraging you not to ‘opt-out’. That decision is solely yours and yours alone to make. A topic of debate I’ve seen presented by some is that they want to die ‘complete’, which I entirely understand. I have my own beliefs about life after death, and to an extent, the fact that I’d rather be cremated than buried does influence my decision to be an organ donor post-mortem. My beliefs are my own and you are equally entitled to yours. Your decision one way or another should not be judged, because it is a decision you have made for yourself, in your best interest.

My role here is however, to tell you that if you don’t make a decision, you really do need to talk to the people who will make the decision on your behalf. There are too many people who don’t discuss organ  donation and many decisions are made by family members who disagree with their relatives’ decision to either ‘opt-in’ or ‘opt-out’. It is crucial that we all have the discussion about organ donation.

I made my family sit down and have an adult conversation about my decision before I applied to ‘opt-in’. My brother has not made a decision to ‘opt-in’ or to ‘opt-out’ but by having the discussion, I’m aware of his beliefs on the matter, and I, in turn, am aware of my parents’ decisions on the matter. When the (hopefully very, very distant) time should come for me to have to make the decision on their behalves, I know that I will act in their best interests. I know this, because I’ve had the discussion with them about it. In the same way they’ve had the discussion with me.

Whether you want to be an organ donor or not, let your family know. Express your views in the most basic way possible. Let them know whether you would ultimately like your organs donated. You don’t need to jump into the decision, you do however need to have your family know which side you’d land on. If you don’t talk about it, they may make a decision you disagree with because they think it’s in your best interest. Tell them. Have the discussion.

Let’s all have the chat about organ donation.

By Tirion Davies

 

 

Nobody Really Likes an Angry, Angry Man

 

Nobody Really Likes an Angry, Angry Man

The past few weeks in the news have been odd. With Theresa May’s Brexit deal falling through and her government barely supporting her, the world just seems weird at the moment. But if you haven’t seen a big advert being a headlining article in many newspapers, you’ve probably missed something. Let’s talk about the new Gillette advert.

Gillette, a men’s razor company, recently premiered its new advert, a short film named ‘Believe’. The film replaces Gillette’s signature “The best a man can get” with “The best men can be”. Gillette had said that it wanted to “hold men accountable”, which is exactly what it does with this short film.

The advert shows images of sexual harassment, bullying, misogyny and aggressive behaviour by men, before revisiting these same scenarios, but including another male lead who steps in these certain situations to prevent these behaviours. In the times of MeToo and HeForShe, the film shows men exactly why these movements have been so important as of late. By giving examples of inappropriate behaviour and counting it as inappropriate behaviour, it begins to hold men accountable for their actions. The behaviour we’ve seen time and time again as branded ‘boys will be boys’ finally gets the boot that says ‘no, this is wrong, and no one should allow this to happen’. By suggesting other men should prevent this behaviour if they see it, it creates reinforcement that the behaviour shown is inappropriate. Behaviour women have been telling the world for years is inappropriate, needed a man to reinforce this message. People are listening, but they’re not fans.

The endless comments on the YouTube video show men claiming it to be “feminist propaganda” and suggesting that stepping in to prevent sexual harassment is stating that Gillette no longer want the business of “manly men”. If you think being manly includes being a bully and a sexual harasser, your issues go far beyond any advert. Gillette probably doesn’t want your business if you think that way.

The short film did gain some positive feedback from very few men, but those who supported the advert commented on its powerful message. “By eliminating excuses for bad behaviour, and supporting a new generation working toward their personal ‘best’, we can help create a positive change that will matter for years to come” says Gillette’s president, Gary Coombe. Gillette has partnered with the Building a Better Man project for this short film (which aims to reduce violent behaviour in men) to help induce a drop in male violent behaviour and suggest more positive behaviours for men of the future.

Gillette knew that its advertising would cause backlash. But even I’m shocked it caused as much backlash as it did. Admittedly, it’s by men who are trying to justify the behaviours shown in the advert

as appropriate, but which could be seen to be eerily similar to their own behaviours. But the fact is, this conversation needed to happen – it did. In my opinion, there’s no arguing that the behaviours seen in the short film are in any way healthy. The fact that there are so many who can’t see that these scenarios are problems is indicative of the change that is surely needed.

I’m not telling you that you need to wholeheartedly support this advert and give it all the press in the world (that would be ideal, but some people will always seek to find a problem). I am however telling you that if you don’t identify the behaviours seen in the advert as inappropriate or wrong, you are a part of this problem. This short film was designed specifically to call out these scenarios and show, without an ounce of sugar coating that these behaviours are unacceptable. You don’t have to buy Gillette for the rest of your life or post this advert to every social media platform. You just have to understand why these behaviours are wrong and see that the advert is doing the right thing – it’s discussing it. The world has a problem with discussing toxic behaviours in both women, but especially men. Gillette is holding people accountable. We all need to do this.

The advert had been watched over 2 million times on YouTube in 48 hours. Backlash and support aside, take what you will from this advert but understand Gillette’s point is valid. It may be hard to swallow for some people, but the message needs to be heard. 2019 is holding everyone accountable for their actions, and I’m glad for it. Nobody really likes an angry man.

By Tirion Davies

 

 

Reflections on the Past Year

Reflecting on the past year has been incredibly hard, but also somewhat of a blessing in disguise. I can easily confirm 2018 to be the hardest year so far for me emotionally and mentally. Exams all but broke me and the wait for my results was heart-wrenching. My first term at university has just come to an end; the beginning was rocky, and I was worried that the feeling of faliing would mean I would never find my own feet amongst the feelings of uncertainty and anxiety. 2018 was rough mentally and by this point of the year, I’m practically a mess. But when I began to reflect on the social aspect of my 2018, I saw a very different side to the story.

2018 has been the year of me. Absurdly cheesy and cliché, I’m very much aware. But I really feel I’ve come into my own this past year in a way I don’t think I had before. I became published officially this year in ‘Buzz Magazine’ whilst I was working there on a work experience placement. I’m a full-fledged journalist now, ladies and gentlemen – I did my first ever interview and everything! The experience allowed me to explore journalism and expand my skills, as well as explore the environment I may hopefully work in some day. I got the chance, thanks to a family friend, to shadow her when she was invited to be interviewed on BBC Radio Wales; the staff were incredible and took the time to explain to me the different aspects which surrounded the workings of a radio show, for which I’m forever grateful. I was also on BBC Radio Cymru myself on International Women’s Day with some of my friends, which was an experience and a half!

Although I may be one of the only people to ever quote Joseph Stalin in my personal statement (don’t worry! It was in order to mention how I aim to refute the quote ‘A single death is a tragedy; a million deaths is a statistic’ in my lifetime), I received five university offers! The university I had my heart set on offered me the lowest grade of all the others, and despite the fact it made the emotional aspect of A Levels that much harder because I was so desperate to earn my place, it worked out perfectly in the end. Since being at university (I’m studying Welsh and Journalism) I’ve learned so much about Journalism and the fact I’m so incredibly excited to potentially become a Journalist just proves I made the right choice. Since being at university, I’ve appeared on the Welsh radio show ‘Cicio Sodle’’ and it feels like I’m really coming in to my own! I’ve also filmed an advert for the Welsh Government in support of ‘Having a Chat’ about Organ Donation in Wales – a matter I believe very strongly in (I Opted-In this year and I feel it was the best decision for me!).

Reflecting on this year means reflecting on my friends and on my own personal growth. At the beginning of 2018, I felt as though I had a complete lack of self-esteem concerning my appearance. With the help of my incredibly supportive friends, and the ‘I Weigh’ online movement, I’ve become far more confident in my own skin. It was once a rarity to see below my shoulders in a photo, but now it’s common place to see a full-length picture of my body. I’ve learnt to embrace my body and understand that being skinny doesn’t define beauty. Okay, I’m not completely healed of hating my body. HOWEVER, this past year I’ve learned to stop caring, and I’ve realised that I worry about people looking at my stomach when I sit down. I don’t care what other people’s stomachs look like when they sit down – which means no one’s going to care about me and my little tummy. Wearing bikinis has never been my thing, but this year I embraced it, and I felt more in my element wearing bikinis and form-fitting one pieces than ever before.

I’ve found myself surrounded by a support system of sensational people this year. My best friends are the people who are always there to listen to me and who don’t care if I say something stupid. I mean, yeah, they’ll bring it up for the rest of my life, but that’s true friendship – I know they’ll be around for the rest of my life. Two of my best friends moved to a completely different city this year; they’ve both found this first term difficult but considering they’re two of the people who’ve taught me the most about strength, I know they’ll be fine. If it’s not fine it’s not the end (thanks Mam and Dad for being so great this year). Finding new friends when you’ve become accustomed to people you’ve known since you were eleven, or even four is incredibly hard. To everyone who’s made it easy to be friends with at university: I thank you all.

This year I’ve changed. 2018 was the year of me; I learned a lot about myself and despite it not being my best year, it’s by far not my worst. To everyone reading this, I thank you for following my journey. I’m not sure you understand how thankful I am to you. I’ve changed, but I’m still me.

By Tirion Davies

 

 

SUDDEN SINKING

SUDDEN SINKING

 

At sea things can go wrong very quickly, as Barry Dock and Penarth lifeboat crews found out on 12th June

Kath Fisher couldn’t sleep. Tossing and turning, she thought: ‘Is this an omen that something’s about to happen?’. At 1.15am her lifeboat pager went off.

Volunteers all around Penarth and Barry Dock shook themselves awake and headed for their lifeboat stations. It was a Mayday call; an emergency at sea where life is at risk – a fishing boat, with two onboard, was taking on water at a notorious local black spot off Lavernock Point.

Penarth crew were first on scene in their fast agile Atlantic 91 Class lifeboat and crew member Matt Church took a salvage pump onto the yacht to try and pump out the water before taking the yacht under tow. They’d be back home in bed in no time.

However luck was not on their side and the flooding quickly overwhelmed the salvage pumps capability and within a minute the yacht had sunk beneath them whilst still under tow, a very dangerous situation for the 2 fishermen, lifeboat crewman Matt and the crew of the towing lifeboat. Kath, aboard the Penarth lifeboat, quickly realised the danger and cut the tow rope enabling the lifeboat to do an immediate U turn to help the 3 people now in the water. It all happened so quickly that the two fishermen hadn’t had time to inflate their lifejackets so Matt, now a casualty himself, struggled to keep himself and the two others afloat. Kath, realising the situation jumped into the sea along with fellow crew member James King to support the casualties.

Within moments support thankfully arrived with the large well-equipped Barry Dock All-Weather Trent Class lifeboat “Inner Wheel II” along with a Coastguard Search & Rescue helicopter. Barry Dock lifeboat Coxswain Martin Bowmer immediately set off a flare illuminating the entire area supported by the massively bright helicopter searchlight. However the situation called on all his skill and experience in charge of the 18 tonne lifeboat as the three casualties had drifted into very rocky, shallow water. With only a metre of water beneath his keel in unpredictable coastline in pitch black seas he carefully used the Trent’s immense engines to keep his lifeboat steady allowing his crew to safely haul colleague Matt and fishermen Jason and Andy aboard. The immediate danger had passed and all 3 were taken into the Trent lifeboat’s wheelhouse to be warmed, reassured and assessed for injuries. Meanwhile Martin then turned the lifeboat around, powered up her twin diesel engines and headed back to Barry Dock to hand over the casualties to waiting Paramedics. By 2.30 am the emergency had passed enabling all the volunteer crew members to return to their stations on Penarth Esplanade and at Barry Dock respectively. After a detailed debriefing and a washing and checking of all boats and equipment both crews ‘Stood Down’ and civilian life returned with crews returning home to their much deserved beds.

Thankfully both fishermen received a clean-bill of

health by A&E staff.

This story is testament to the skill, dedication and training of the RNLI volunteer crews and the wonderful boats and equipment of the RNLI around the entire coastline of the UK and Ireland

Story summarised with kind permission of the RNLI from the ‘Lifeboat’ magazine issue 625, Autumn 2018. Credited to author Miréad Dane

 

 

MEMORIES OF CHRISTMAS PAST

I was brought up in a mining community where, following the 1926 strike until well into the Thirties, there was quite a lot of poverty. Perhaps you would like to know what Christmas was like when I was a little girl.
People had very little money to spend on Christmas, which in those days was completely different from what it is today. There was not the preparation and buying from October onwards. A week or two before Christmas day we would start making our own streamers from bits of coloured paper; mostly we would make paper chains. The majority of people were quite poor, so we didn’t have as many presents as children have today. For instance we didn’t get anything from Aunts & Uncles because every family could only afford a little extra for food. We just got one present from Father Christmas and our stocking.
Dad’s relatives had a farm in Ireland, so we were luckier than a lot of families as they always sent us a goose; they would put it on the overnight boat & we would get it off the train from Fishguard the following morning, Christmas Eve. Our local grocer would take his horse and cart to the station and collect parcels off the train and he would come around the streets delivering. We children would be quite excited, dancing in the road, waiting for him to arrive.
Mam & Dad would tell us to hang up our stockings beside the big open fireplace and then we would go to bed. They would then take out what money they had managed to save and go to Tonypandy shopping at 10 o’clock. The shops would still be open and they would be able to pick up bargains and some luxuries to eat. When they finished their shopping they would go to midnight mass, so by the time they walked home it would be 2a.m.
Gran lived with us and it would be her job to feather, clean and prepare the goose and stuff it ready for the oven.
Of course we were always awake very early Christmas morning, to delve in our stockings and see what Father Christmas had brought. We usually had an apple, an orange, a couple of nuts and one small present. We didn’t feel hard done by because we had so little, as everyone had the same, and it was more than we normally had; so Christmas still had magic about it.
About 7o’clock we would walk with Dad to the ‘Bakehouse’. People had no central heating so on a very cold morning we would feel we were in wonderland seeing all the different intricate patterns Jack Frost would leave on the windows.
We didn’t have gas or electric cookers in those days. We had a black grate with an open fire and a small oven beside it, which would take a long time to warm. The ‘Bakehouse’ as we called it was the local bakery; they made bread and cakes. On Christmas Eve the women would take their Christmas cakes to be cooked slowly during the night. Then early Christmas morning the men would take their fowl in its roasting dish & for sixpence (old money) Mr James, the Bakehouse owner, would cook our goose for us, so we could use our fire and oven for cooking vegetables.
We would then go to mass and Father would give all us children an orange or a few sweets as we came out. I suppose that when we got home from church we would have our Christmas dinner but I don’t really remember much about eating everything; else was too exciting.
After dinner we would play games or Dad would do Irish jigs or he would play his melodeon for us to dance to the music. All the excitement of Christmas was just the same as it is today. You see there will always be a spirit of Christmas if you look for it.
We would all go to bed very tired, but very happy.
Today one of my fondest memories is the excitement of walking that 300 yards or so on a crisp early Christmas morning, with Dad, taking the goose to be cooked. The delicious smells from the Bakehouse would greet you long before you reached it.

Change

If you’re unaware as to who Brett Kavanaugh is, I’m sure you’ve not glanced at the news recently. The Supreme Court nominee, accused of attempted sexual assault, who despite the odds, became a Supreme Court Justice and proved that in America, when a woman accuses a man of sexual misconduct, she is the liar. A pattern we have unfortunately seen repeated time and time again.

Dr Christine Blasey Ford had received “actual threats to her safety and her life” before appearing in front of the Senate judiciary committee to testify against the then-nominee Kavanaugh. Despite numerous witnesses to the attempted assault, including a high school friend of Kavanaugh’s who is alleged to have been present in the room during the attempted assault, Ford’s accusation was dismissed as being ‘politically charged’ by many. But the theme of dismissing sexual assault claims as ‘lies’ or ‘opportunistic’ isn’t new, and neither is it uncommon. The world has a problem believing a claim of sexual misconduct, and I don’t know why. According to a 2015 report by the National Sexual Violence Resource Centre, the prevalence of false reporting sexual violence in the United States is only between 2% and 10%. Considering that the report also states, “a study of eight U.S. communities, which included 2,059 cases of sexual assault, found a 7.1% rate of false reports” why can’t we believe the people who are brave enough to come forward to speak about their trauma?

Three women including Ford came forward to accuse Kavanaugh of sexual misconduct. There is no excuse of ‘it was a mistake he made once’ (an incredibly weak excuse at that – rape is rape, attempted rape is no different; that’s not a mistake, that’s a choice to violate someone) Kavanaugh had a pattern of violating women. And still, the highest court in America took his side.

In 2017, Brett Kavanaugh was on the DC Circuit Court of Appeals and ruled against a 17-year-old undocumented teenager who was attempting to obtain an abortion. Jane Doe, who did not want her identity revealed throughout the case, arrived in the

United States without her parents and was taken into the U.S. Custody. She was pregnant and was aiming to exercise her constitutional right to obtain a legal abortion; this right extends not only to United States citizens, but also foreigners within the US. Kavanaugh had delayed her ability to obtain a legal abortion and claimed that the government should not facilitate her abortion, but at 15 weeks pregnant, her window was closing. Kavanaugh stated “she is pregnant and has to make a major life decision”, but his action in ruling against her plea seems to claim that he believed having an abortion was more life altering than having a child which would have been unwanted, and a child Jane Doe would have been unable to financially support. Jane Doe eventually obtained the right to legally obtain an abortion within the United States, but it was she who gained much of the backlash for the decision, not those who voted against her. A tweet by Teen Vogue columnist, Lauren Duca stated “It seems to me that when Brett Kavanaugh attempted to deny a 17-year-old immigrant an abortion, he believed that the decisions you make as a minor ought to have lifelong consequences. Let’s treat him the same way”.

Let's treat him the same way. The old 'boys will be boys' line is dated and inexcusable. Kavanaugh's actions in the attempted sexual assault when he was a teenager doesn't mean he can't still be held accountable for his actions now. Jane Doe will be seen as the immigrant who got rid of her baby, and yet Brett Kavanaugh's attempted sexual assault and the many claims which have also come to light have been dismissed and he now holds a position of power high enough to be influential in cases such as his in the future. And you know which way he'll vote then. America's poor judgement seems sewn into its history; a man who was accused of rape is now their President, their history of gun violence is unchanged and they are breaking their own record year after year with the worst mass shootings in American history. It's shocking that a man like Kavanaugh could go through such a heavily-followed case which included numerous allegations of sexual misconduct and still be awarded with one of the highest seats at the table. It's shocking. But it's not surprising.

From the Harvey Weinstein story of last year, to the MeToo campaign, to the Kavanaugh case, the world has proven that barely anyone believes those who have accused others of sexual misconduct. We typically believe the accused, and I’m sick of it.

I believe her. I believe him. I believe those who have come forward with their stories. Sexual misconduct is a matter which shouldn’t be taken lightly. But it’s a topic where we have consistently let down those who must fight to even be heard. Please let it stop.

By Tirion Davies

Early-Marriages Are Detrimental

 

Since I was little, I imagined what my future wedding would be like. The dress, the layout, the partner; all children daydream about the day they will marry their soulmate. I always wondered what they would look like, their personality, how we would meet, how old I would be and how long it would take for us to get engaged. But I realise now, my imagination of what the future would hold for me was because I get to make a choice. Unfortunately, choice isn’t granted to every girl in the world.

I’m eighteen, and currently, I don’t see myself marrying for probably another ten years. I haven’t met the person – I haven’t even come close. But 12 million girls all over the world are married before they reach eighteen. Before their life begins. 23 girls every minute; almost 1 every 2 seconds. A choice they can’t make themselves; a choice they aren’t allowed to make themselves.

Being Welsh, I know gender pay inequality is still an issue that women in the UK face, but in the big scheme of things, it’s hardly the women of the world’s biggest concern. Of course, the gender pay gap ought to close and I truly hope it does; I aim to be a part of that conversation. But the truth of the matter is, gender inequality reaches so far beyond pay in many of the countries around the world and extends to the genuine belief that women are so inferior to men on a much larger scale. In numerous countries, being born a girl immediately creates a burden on a family; to ease economic hardship, and ‘burden’ another family in place of theirs, families marry off their young daughters. Patriarchal values aid in child marriage, as there is a desire by the patriarchal society in these countries to control a women, by the way they dress, how she should behave and most importantly, who she should marry.

Child marriage seems to us like some barbaric burden placed on young girls. So many countries practice child marriage simply as it is something that has happened for generations, but it doesn’t justify the practice. In Southern Ethiopia for example, harmful practices are often linked, with child marriage leading to female genital mutilation; practices may be tradition, but they can be harmful to those involved. Many young girls who are married are expected to have children, but many get pregnant when their bodies have only just started puberty. They die because their bodies are not equipped to carrying a baby, and certainly not built for giving birth to them.

GirlsNotBrides is a global partnership of over 1000 civil society organisations which are dedicated to ending child marriage. Their theory of change involves ideas such as empowering girls and giving them opportunities to build skills and knowledge; by encouraging them to become agents of change themselves, we can  continue the chain of empowering young girls. With the Safe Space Programmes, we can successfully build girls’ self-confidence, for married girls who do not receive an education, they offer self-sufficiency and having a safe place to meet with other girls who have shared the same experiences, the feeling of isolation and vulnerability can begin to be removed. The work the global partnership does with men and boys who become husbands, or who are brothers and fathers shows the value of encouraging young girls and aiding to fulfil their potential.

Child marriage, according to ‘GirlsNotBrides’ website ‘violates girls’ rights to health, education and opportunity. It exposes girls to violence throughout their lives and traps them in a cycle of poverty’. More than 650 million women, and over 150 million men have suffered child marriage, and without faster progress the global number of women married as children will reach 1.2 billion by 2050. If we help to support GirlsNotBrides, we can help end the devastating consequences of child marriage. Progress is being made, with the African Union and the South Asia Initiative to End Violence Against Children having launched initiatives to help end child marriages and support young married girls; more and more countries are developing national action plans to end child marriage, in partnership with the UN.

A campaign conducted by the Network of Roma, Ashkali and Egyptian Women Organizations of Kosovo (a project under the EU-UN jurisdiction ‘Implementing Norms, Changing Minds’) have allowed for communities in Kosovo to understand the detrimental restrictions early-marriage forces upon young girls’ prospect of a safe life. A young man named Qerim completed his training on the prevention of early-marriage and has begun his door-to-door programme of beginning conversations in his neighbourhood and is encouraging them to consider the effects early-marriage has on the young women within their own community. By opening the conversation to communities where child marriage is often a tradition, we can help prevent the practice.

You may not think this is a problem we should deal with, as it is not a problem on Britain’s doorstep. But it doesn’t mean we can’t help in the matter. Supporting the UN and global partnerships like GirlsNotBrides, FreedomUnited, Amnesty International, Plan International and so many more can make even the slightest difference. By continuing the conversation and understanding how early-marriages are detrimental, you are a part of change.

Child marriage needs to stop and progress isn’t happening fast enough. Support these global partnerships and become a part of change.

By Tirion Davies

 

 

One-Woman Show

 

Sorting the Sock Drawer

– A one-woman show by Eirwen Malin on Thursday 27th September 2018, 7pm Wenvoe Arms Function Room.

“Medron was a good king; kind, just and surprisingly progressive. The country prospered. But there was something wrong, something wrong with Medron himself and he knew it. It all started when he noticed that the sole of his right shoe kept wearing out much more quickly than the left”

After several years of occasional visits to the GP surgery with odd and unexplained symptoms, one of the GPs referred me to a neurologist “to put my mind at rest”. After nearly 12 months of waiting, I finally got my appointment and the consultant unexpectedly, and with somewhat clumsy practice, diagnosed Parkinson’s Disease, a degenerative, incurable, neurological condition which according to him is “devastating in its later stages”. My world had been upended but the good (?) news was PD does not particularly shorten lifespan. You just have to learn to live with it, potentially for a very long time.

Sorting the Sock Drawer intertwines Medron’s mythical journey with my personal path. As protagonists of each story we gain new strengths as we face challenges and arrive at journey’s end with a changed and meaningful life. Come and join us to hear what I hope is an entertaining and uplifting tale.

I’ll look forward to a chat in the bar afterwards.

This is the first date of a new tour of the show. Previous audiences have said:-

“Funny, sad, thought-provoking."

"Beautifully crafted. I love the blend of traditional and personal story.”

“The message will stay with me… Life is different, but not necessarily worse”

Thanks to Jenny and Digby at The Wenvoe for providing the venue for free. There is no charge though there will be a voluntary donation to a Parkinson’s charity.

Numbers are restricted so please book your seat by texting Phil 07870 212437 or email philipthomas664@gmail.com.

Access to the venue is via steps – apologies to those who have restricted mobility.

Running time about 1hour 15 mins.

I hope to see you there

Eirwen

 

 

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