{"id":6832,"date":"2019-12-10T13:18:29","date_gmt":"2019-12-10T12:18:29","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/wenvoe.org.uk\/?p=6832"},"modified":"2019-12-10T13:18:29","modified_gmt":"2019-12-10T12:18:29","slug":"the-boy-who-laughed-at-santa-claus","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"http:\/\/wenvoe.org.uk\/?p=6832","title":{"rendered":"The Boy Who Laughed At Santa Claus"},"content":{"rendered":"

The Boy Who Laughed At Santa Claus <\/strong><\/p>\n

In Baltimore there lived a boy
\nHe wasn’t anybody’s joy.
\nAlthough his name was Jabez Dawes
\nHis character was full of flaws.
\nIn school he never led his classes
\nHe hid old ladies’ reading glasses
\nHis mouth was open when he chewed
\nAnd elbows to the table glued.
\nHe stole the milk of hungry kittens
\nAnd walked through doors marked No Admittance.
\nHe said he acted thus because
\nThere wasn’t any Santa Claus.<\/p>\n

Another trick that tickled Jabez
\nWas crying “Boo!” at little babies.
\nHe brushed his teeth \u00a0they said in town
\nSideways instead of up and down.
\nYet people pardoned every sin
\nAnd viewed his antics with a grin
\nTill they were told by Jabez Dawes
\n“There isn’t any Santa Claus!”<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

Deploring how he did behave
\nHis parents swiftly sought their grave.
\nThey hurried through the portals pearly
\nAnd Jabez left the funeral early.
\nLike whooping cough
\nfrom child to child
\nHe sped to spread the rumor wild:
\n“Sure as my name is Jabez Dawes
\nThere isn’t any Santa Claus!”<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

Slunk like a weasel or a marten
\nThrough nursery and kindergarten
\nWhispering low to every tot
\n“There isn’t any no there’s not!”
\nThe children wept all Christmas Eve
\nAnd Jabez chortled up his sleeve.
\nNo infant dared to hang up his stocking
\nFor fear of Jabez’ ribald mocking.
\nHe sprawled on his untidy bed
\nFresh malice dancing in his head
\nWhen presently with scalp a-tingling
\nJabez heard a distant jingling;
\nHe heard the crunch of sleigh and hoof
\nCrisply alighting on the roof.
\nWhat good to rise and bar the door?
\nA shower of soot was on the floor.
\nWhat was beheld by Jabez Dawes?
\nThe fireplace full of Santa Claus!
\nThen Jabez fell upon his knees
\nWith cries of “Don’t ” and “Pretty please.
\n” He howled “I don’t know where you read it
\nBut anyhow I never said it!”<\/p>\n

“Jabez ” replied the angry saint
\n“It isn’t I it’s you that ain’t.
\nAlthough there is a Santa Claus
\nThere isn’t any Jabez Dawes!”
\nSaid Jabez with impudent vim
\n“Oh yes there is; and I am him!
\nYour magic don’t scare me it doesn’t”—
\nAnd suddenly he found he wasn’t!
\nFrom grimy feet to grimy locks
\nJabez became a Jack-in-the-box
\nAn ugly toy with springs unsprung
\nForever sticking out his tongue.<\/p>\n

The neighbors heard his mournful squeal;
\nThey searched for him but not with zeal.
\nNo trace was found of Jabez Dawes
\nWhich led to thunderous applause
\nAnd people drank a loving cup
\nAnd went and hung their stockings up.
\nAll you who sneer at Santa Claus
\nBeware the fate of Jabez Dawes
\nThe saucy boy who mocked the saint.
\nDonder and Blitzen licked off his paint.<\/p>\n

By Ogden Nash<\/em><\/strong><\/p>\n

\n
\n

 <\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

The Boy Who Laughed At Santa Claus In Baltimore there lived a boy He wasn’t anybody’s joy. Although his name was Jabez Dawes His character was full of flaws. In school he never led his classes He hid old ladies’ reading glasses His mouth was open when he chewed And elbows to the table glued. He stole the milk of […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":4,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"footnotes":"","jetpack_publicize_message":"","jetpack_is_tweetstorm":false,"jetpack_publicize_feature_enabled":true,"jetpack_social_post_already_shared":false,"jetpack_social_options":{"image_generator_settings":{"template":"highway","enabled":false}}},"categories":[128,57,127],"tags":[],"jetpack_publicize_connections":[],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack_shortlink":"https:\/\/wp.me\/p6cWjO-1Mc","jetpack-related-posts":[{"id":14174,"url":"http:\/\/wenvoe.org.uk\/?p=14174","url_meta":{"origin":6832,"position":0},"title":"“Christmas is Murder” by Val McDermid","author":"Alan Williams","date":"9th April 2024","format":false,"excerpt":"\"Christmas is Murder\" by Val McDermid \u00a0 A book of twelve short stories with different themes: detective, revenge, supernatural and historic. The settings were varied. Several readers felt that short stories worked well for bedtime reading. The stories were generally felt to be well written, but not chilling. Members who\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Wenvoe Page Turners"","block_context":{"text":"Wenvoe Page Turners","link":"http:\/\/wenvoe.org.uk\/?cat=41"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":11017,"url":"http:\/\/wenvoe.org.uk\/?p=11017","url_meta":{"origin":6832,"position":1},"title":"First Meeting of 2022 Outdoors.","author":"Alan Williams","date":"7th February 2022","format":false,"excerpt":"Welsh Government Covid restrictions meant the Page Turners had their first meeting of 2022 outdoors. The group gathered under unbelievably blue skies and strolled towards Watchtower Bay. 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